Alice VS.....STRESS!!!

Stress... we all  suffer  from it.  Work, lack of work, no sleep, no money, kids, family  reunions,  traffic jerks, a boss who's a jerk --it's all enough to drive us   over the edge  and adds to our daily stress.  How to deal? What to do? Some seek  out costly counselors, others  suffer in silence and still others just drop dead  from the stress they've had  boiling up in their system over the  years.   I have an easier, better solution!!  It is called PEEP  THERAPY  and is something I came up with about 20 years ago. It's simple,  inexpensive and  quite frankly-- FUN!

In case you have been living under a rock, PEEPS are those   wonderful sugar coated,marshmallow treats that used to be only available at   Easter. You could choose from a bunny or a chick in a variety of marvelous   colors back then but NOW?! There are pumpkins, ghosts, cats, hearts,  snowmen,  Christmas trees, stars and reindeer; you have a LOT to choose from!   Pretty  much no matter what season your get stressed in, you have access. Also  the fact  that peeps have a shelf life of roughly a MILLION or so years, you can  buy in  bulk, just in case!

How this works is simple: Whenever you have an issue with   someone-- you don't even have to know their name, just what they did; like that   jerk who cut you off in traffic and had the nerve to flip YOU off; simply go to   your PEEP stash (I assume  you HAVE a PEEP stash?) and take out 1 Peep!   That's step one!

STEP 2: Address the PEEP! For example:  "Bob, you screwed me   over in the meeting by claiming my idea as your own, I hope you rot and DIE!"     Be honest with your Peep, tell it EVERYTHING it did wrong and how angry it has   made you! Trust me, it will not interrupt you but continue to take your verbal   abuse with a rather blank look on its little Peep face!

STEP 3:  Bite off  "Bob the Peeps" head!! Savor the victory   over your arch-enemy! Enjoy the yummy sugar and marshmallow (also sugar!) taste   as it goes down!  Continue to nibble on your enemy's carcass until he is all   gone!  Science fact here: Sugar increases the absorption  of  an amino acid called tryptophan which helps your body make serotonin. Of  course  we all know serotonin is the good chemical in the brain that gives  you  happy feelings, which is why Peep Therapy is such a brilliant  idea!

Still TICKED?  Repeat steps 1 - 3 until you feel better or  are  so jazzed from all the sugar that you have to literally RUN somewhere right now!

Now for a little variation; you can alter step 3 a bit. Say   "BOB" really ticked you off- -stole your riding mower and slept with your  wife--  it is time to go "NUCLEAR" on his butt.  After addressing "BOB" you place him in the   microwave (use a paper plate underneath--you'll thank me later!) and set it  on  HIGH!  This will cause "BOB" to expand exponentially and eventually blow up!  Of  course you will have to clean up the microwave and will not get the sugar  rush  found in the original process, but it's a blast (literally) and you will  enjoy  seeing "BOB" blow up as many times as possible without actually harming  him and  being forced to go to jail, even though that was a really nice mower  and he had  it coming!

If you are from New Orleans and like a little Voodoo, "BOB"   can be used as a pincushion!  You can eat "BOB" after the torture, but take   extra precautions to make sure ALL the needles are out first!

Again, this is simple, easy and inexpensive and you find   yourself laughing at the ridiculousness of the whole thing and "Bob" gets to   live another day!  I challenge you to stock up on PEEPS and get ready to devour   the stress in your life one fluffy, sugar filled treat at a time!  Let me hear   how Peep Therapy has helped you!

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